"Hello? Please state your emergency," A woman said on the other line. "My friend Billy.... he ahh overdosed and Billy do you remember when we flipped over the table, and your hobbit feet came flying off?" Dom chuckled nervously. "Uhhh he had some painkillers... and uhhh he I just need help. I need him please come! Billy... uhhh remember tig? We would trick Elijah for hours!" Dom laughed again as he started crying harder. He sat near Billy and pulled Billy to him. "We are at the Sonders Hotel... Please. Room 554" Dom said crying as the woman told him to try to stay calm.
"Stay calm?!" Dom screamed into the phone. "I fucked up... so badly. I love Billy, more then he knows and because I was such an arse... and got soo fucking wrapped up in things that I could live without... I could lose him!" Dom cried as he kissed Billy's forehead. "Don't leave me Billy. I need you. Please. I could lose you forever... and I am not ready for that. I'm not. I am sorry... I'm so sorry." Dom cried dropping the phone to the floor as he repeated himself over and over. "Billy..." He sobbed again. He hadn't heard the sirens pull up to the hotel. He hadn't heard the men enter the room. He hadn't even noticed they were there until they tried to remove Billy from his arms. "NO!" Dom screamed as two men pulled him back and started to check him over. "I can't leave him." He cried. "I can't leave him again..."
The hours can pass like days when you're waiting. The minutes of the clock can move so slowly when you have nothing else to think about. They can make you feel like stone and led, having nothing but the weight of space and time on your shoulders. It had only been three hours. Funny how they can seem like years.
A doctor came out to Dom. He sighed. "Can I talk to you?" he said in a soft voice.
Dom sat still in the chair not trusting himself to speak. He felt numb all over and he nodded as he blinked away tears.
The doctor sighed and knelt down again. "We lost him..." he said softly. "He died for three minutes..."
"We got him back..." He sighed once more. "Don't lose him again." he walked away, saying nothing more.
Dom opened his eyes and looked up after the doctor. He broke out into a shaky laugh and jumped out of his chair. "Can I..?" He whispered to the nurse stationed outside of Billy's door. Without waiting for an answer, he opened the door and walked to the side of Billy's bed. Billy was laying still looking up at the ceiling. Wires and computers were hooked up to him and the slight buzz and beep was heard from the machine. "Billy." Dom whispered kneeling down beside the bed. From all the tears he had spilt in that night, he had thought he was all dry. But seeing Billy's green eyes turn to lock within his made something inside Dom break. Tears fell yet again from his eyes as he moved up to grab Billy's hand. "Billy..."
"I saw it, Dom.." Billy whispered very softly. "I stood high on the rainbow...you know...rainbow bridge and I saw it." Billy looked down. "I saw the gates of heaven today..." Billy continued. "All the people I loved were there...I could have stayed with them, Dom. I could have gone to them like I've wanted to since the day they left." He looked away, tears lining his eyes. "But I didn't."
Dom's breath caught in his throat and he squeezed Billy's hand lightly. He was afraid to speak so instead he pressed a kiss to Billy's hand.
"I saw you on the other side, Dom...when I was looking back...I saw you...and my sister...but...you..." Billy sighed. "You weren't you."
Dom laughed as he took in a shaky breath. "I don't think I am me Billy... I think, who I was then, is different from who I am right now..."
"You were dead." Billy said simply. Not ready to laugh about things just yet.
"I was... But I am back." Dom said softly looking down at his knee which had been cut from the glass he had knelt on. "The Dom you knew before... has finally come out again... I am free... and I am here."
Billy remained looking away, he frowned slightly and felt a tear run down his cheek. "Just tell me," Billy whispered. "I need an answer this time, Dom..." he looked to Dom, his eyes burned into Dom's. "Where did you go?" he asked, trying hard not to cry anymore. "Why did you leave your pippin behind?"
"I went..." Dom said looking up away from Billy's gaze. He took the hand that wasn't holding Billy's to wipe tears away from his eyes. "I don't know where I went... I went away... to a dark place... I thought I didn't need anyone. I thought I could just do it all. I got swallowed again by the darkness and I lost sight of what was really important to me. I forgot what I truly loved." Dom squeezed Billy's hand again. "I started getting angry for no reason at people... and I didn't want to do that to you. So I stopped calling... I stopped doing everything even though it killed me. Even though I knew it killed you. I became someone I wasn't... and who I was before was trapped... trapped in a place I couldn't escape from. Until tonight. When I saw what I had truly done... when.. I finally broke free. And I am never going back." Dom finished.
Billy let go of Dom's hand for a moment and sighed a little. "Sorry," he whispered. He wiped his eyes. "I should have tried to understand." he whispered.
Dom smiled softly and kissed Billy's hand again. "Don't be... I should've fought harder. I am the one that is sorry... so sorry..." Dom trailed off once again thinking of how close he had been to loosing Billy.
Billy sighed and looked to his wrists. "Said I'm going to have pretty interesting scars," he whispered.
"Yeah..." Dom sighed resting his arm and head onto the side of the bed. "Interesting all right... Billy, I want you to know something... I want you to know that I love you, and that I am more sorry then I could ever say." Dom said looking over looking into Billy's eyes.
Billy knew Dom said sorry a lot. In the last month, Dom had said sorry almost 22 times. Billy sighed. Part of him didn't trust Dom when he said that. He did his best to fight past it, despite the small raging in the back of his mind. "I know," he said softly.
Dom smiled and moved his thumb around the back of Billy's hand. "Do you, want me to get you anything?" Dom asked. He was going to make everything up to Billy no matter what it took. He fucked up badly, he knew that. He also could tell that Billy was scared... scared of if things went back to normal, eventually they would change again. Something in the back of Dom's mind made him fear the same thing. But he wouldn't let it happen. He would never let it happen again.
Billy shook his head. "They just told me to drink lots of water...they said my appetite will be down for quite a while...they also told me..." Billy sighed. "Well, I'm going to be sick a lot...just as my body reacts to the drugs," he explained.
Dom shook his head and sighed. "Yeah... makes sense." Dom looked down at the floor. There were so many questions he wanted to ask. So many things he wanted to say. But where to start... and when to start. Billy was not up to any type of long conversation, and Dom didn't want to upset Billy any more then he already had that day.
Billy rested his hands on the bed and rested his head back on the pillows. "I'm just..." He looked down. "I don't even know what to say." he admitted.
"I don't know what to say either." Dom agreed and placed his hands in his lap. "You look really tired Bills... would you like to sleep, get some rest? I won't be going anywhere... but I don't want you staying awake just for me. You have to get better." Dom said biting his lip. He was just glad Billy was okay.
"I'm not tired." he said. "But...you need to get something off your mind.." He could tell Dom wanted to know things. "So..let's just talk...get it out the way."
"Well... I..." Dom sighed and shook his head. No matter what was going on, Billy always could read his mind. "Why... did you feel this was your only way out?" Dom whispered looking away. "Why did you hurt yourself?"
Billy frowned slightly. "I don't know...I suppose when you think you've lost something...something that means so much..." he paused and looked to his wrists. "It makes you want to be somewhere else...so it doesn't hurt as much...so you do things, which hurt, but not in the same way...and then, you forget for a while about why you were sad."
"Oh..." Dom said and nodded slowly. "I wish I had known... I wish I could've seen..." Dom whispered not sure if Billy could even hear him
"And then..." his voice was soft. "When the pain is at its worst...you...you.." his voice waved slightly. "You can see it."
"Yeah." Dom said, his voice cracking. "I ah... I just can't believe I did this to you... that I was so blind..." Dom said staring down at his hands not sure of exactly what to say and knowing there were no excuses. He felt bad. Not just bad, he felt like the dirtiest person... the worst friend... the worst everything. Dom looked up to see Billy looking at him. He opened his mouth to say something but shut it again. There was nothing he could say.
"But.." Billy said softly. "But I'm still here.." he smiled softly "And I can still forgive you."
"I was so afraid Billy... so afraid." Dom said shakily. "I thought, I had lost you... I don't know what I would've done then... I thought you were gone... and I thought they had killed me when they pulled you away from me... I have never been more scared in my life."
Billy sighed. "But Dom...this is how I've been feeling all those months.." he said. "Now do you understand why I wanted to go?"
Dom nodded. "But you didn't." He said softly. "You didn't go... you stayed. Why?" Dom asked titling his head his vision becoming blurred. "I wanted you here... but you had wanted to go so badly... but you are here."
"Because.." Billy looked down. "Because you wanted me to stay."
Dom laughed shortly as a tear rolled down his cheek. He took Billy's hand once again and pressed it to his face. "You stayed for me?" He whispered
He nodded. "I stayed for my Merry."
Dom opened his mouth to speak but closed it and nodded. Another tear rolled down his cheek and he brushed them away, nodding once again. "For your Merry... Pippin, my Pippin..." Dom said licking his lips. "I am glad you did."
"I had my time with my parents and grandmother...and they'll be waiting for me when I go back..." he looked to Dom slightly. "But my time...its not done here...not yet. Not with you." he said softly. "So I stayed."
"Things are going to be different now." Dom whispered wiping his cheeks. "But in a better way."
Billy half nodded. "I hope so.." he sniffed a little. "Though I would give anything to see my parents just one last time." he admitted softly.
Dom nodded understanding. "You will one day."
Billy rested his head against the pillows again and smiled. "Well, I never thought I'd be in a hospital in almost every country in the world. If its not me, its someone else I have to see...there was almost everyone in New Zealand, Elijah had to go to hospital once in Japan..." Billy giggled. "And when Sean sat on the log and got a 7-inch splinter up his arse...I don't think he'll be going back to Iceland anytime soon."
Dom laughed lightly. "And you cannot forget Orlando... back, nose, legs, arm, I think he's even scrambled those brains of his." Dom said seriously, trying to keep a straight he smiled softly and sighed.
"God, Orlando's broken everything..." he smiled. "What about when Bean broke his arm? Remember we were doing a scene and he just crumpled to the floor and started to cry?" Billy laughed. "No-one knew what was going on! We were like, well, that's not in the script!"
"I do remember that!" Dom laughed and shook his head. "That, was a crazy day. But I think, there is one thing I will never forget... when Sean, you, me and Lij were by the river waiting to get picked up and Sean started to direct the helicopters so they would land correctly!" Dom laughed at the memory of Sean waving his arms wildly.
Billy laughed loudly. "I remember!" He giggled, his nose scrunching up at the side. "He was telling them that there was other ones behind them!"
Dom laughed as he watched Billy laugh. It must've been the first time he had heard Billy laugh in... months. "Yeah.. I will never forget that." Dom laughed quietly.
"Oh my god! your splinter!" Billy giggled loudly. "I will never forget that!"
"Three inches, I swear it was three inches!" Dom said laughing once again. That thing had hurt!
"You were talking like it was about ten!" Billy suddenly laughed very loudly. "What about.." he giggled and tried not to laugh as he spoke. "When we were surfing..." Billy let out a small laugh. "And you...you...you stood upright on the board, and I shouted "SHARK!" And you jumped right off and swam all the way back to shore!" Billy burst out laughing
Dom glared for a second at Billy before laughing out just as loud as Billy was laughing. "That was so not funny! You scared the shit out of me ya wanker! And Orlando, Orlando was running away from the beach! As if it could chase him!" Dom laughed again and threw his head backwards
Billy laughed so hard, he nodded, but couldn't even speak. "Oh my god! Remember when Orlando came into our trailer...and we had the lights turned off..." Billy sniggered. "and you were laying on the bed...I don't know, pissed blind drunk, and he thought you were dead!" Billy screamed with laughter..."He came running onto set, all prissy screaming: "He's dead!, DEAR GOD, HE'S DEAD!"
Dom laughed wheezily, almost unable to breathe as he said in between gasps, "Yeah! yeah... and you... you came... running in... and then I heard... Orlando!.. you wanker... he's just.. pissed... and I almost fell of the... bed!" Dom laughed again and tried to calm down. The nurse in the door way had turned around, so she was looking into the room, and had a confused look on her face. "I think...we're scaring her." Dom whispered laughing again.
Billy sniggered loudly. He glanced at her and back to Dom. "She fancies you." he giggled.
Dom turned around and winked at her before turning back to Billy laughing. "Oh yeah.. I am quite the catch. I probably look like shite right now! It's all you Bills." Dom laughed raising both of his eyebrows.
"Yeah right." Billy said shaking his head and watching as the nurse slowly came into the room. She placed a hnad on Dom's shoulder making Dom turn around and smiled lightly at them both.
"Mr. Boyd is going to need to get a lot of rest before he can be realeased... You boys have had a rough night. Mr. Monaghan would you like a car to come and take you home?" She asked softly.
Dom looked up at her blankly. "No thank you... I am going to stay right here."
"I'm not tired either." Billy said softly shaking his head. Dom looked from Billy to the nurse and took Billy's hand again.
"She is right... You are going to need your rest. And if you think about it, the more you rest the sooner we can get home. I will be right here waiting for you when you wake up. I'm not going anywhere." Dom said giving his hand a reassuring squeeze and smile.
Billy sighed and looked away. The nurse smiled a little before turning out of the room.
"Just try to get some sleep okay?" Dom said softly sliding down on his chair to get more comfortable.
"Yeah..." Billy replied looking away and letting his eyes flutter shut.